Practice the Power of Neutral Tool in Communications
Communication problems can deplete resilience fast. You may feel you’re not being heard, that you’re being misunderstood, wrongly blamed, unfairly treated, or pressured into decisions you don’t agree with. As soon as you experience any of these feelings, tell yourself, “I’m going to practice the Power of Neutral.” Have a genuine “I mean business” attitude to really move those emotions into a more neutral state and shift your physiology. It could take a few minutes, but it’s worth the genuine practice. Using the Power of Neutral this way in communications can fill your gas tank of resilience fast.
Here are the simple steps of the tool:
Step 1: Take a time-out, breathing slowly and deeply. Imagine the air entering and leaving through the heart area or the center of your chest.
Step 2: Focus on your heart and breathing instead of your stressful thoughts and worried feelings.
Step 3: Continue until you have neutralized the emotional charge and you feel calmness throughout.
Step 4: Now from a calmer place, try to release assumptions and see more possibilities as you listen from the heart. If the impulse to interrupt arises, gently let it go and refocus on your heart and breathing through your heart area. Then when it’s your turn to speak, you will be able to speak more authentically from a calmer, more centered place.
Managing and overcoming challenges, like communication problems and other stressors, comes a little easier for people who have increased their resilience capacity. This is because practicing emotional energy regulation builds emotional vitality and accumulates resilience, which helps prevent energy loss and enables you to recover more quickly from energy drains during life’s challenges.
“Increasing resilience can help prevent as well as smooth out many emotional gridlocks,” says Dr. Rollin McCraty, Institute of HeartMath Director of Research. “Yet, with resilience, like any desired state such as happiness, good health and creativity, we must take action to learn to create it. Increasing resilience requires intention and practice, but is very doable.”
Resilience Tip #4
Reset – Increase Emotional Vitality Fast
Institute of HeartMath research has shown that it is possible to shift into a positive emotional state, release stress-producing attitudes and reset your system after a stressful experience. Using the Reset tool, you can increase your emotional vitality and reset your response to stress, which can also help your hormonal balance.
DHEA is often called the “vitality hormone.” Increasing your DHEA level can be a big factor in having more resilience capacity. Positive emotions increase DHEA and research shows that increasing your positive feelings of appreciation and gratitude can increase DHEA levels fast. Intentionally practicing and feeling gratitude and appreciation helps you maintain positive attitudes and find the initiative to move forward and achieve your goals despite obstacles.
When you’re experiencing positive emotions, like appreciation, more possibilities come into your view. Positive psychology researcher Barbara Fredrickson found that: “Through experiences of positive emotions people transform themselves, becoming more creative, knowledgeable, resilient, socially integrated and healthy individuals.”
Step 1: Simply focus your attention in the area of your heart and recall a memory of a person, place, pet or fun experience that you sincerely appreciate.
Step 2: Now breathe the feeling (not just the thought) of appreciation or gratitude for that through your heart area for 15 to 30 seconds.
Step 3: Doing steps 1 and 2 can reset your heart rhythm pattern and your autonomic nervous system which regulates 90% of your body’s involuntary functions, including the hormonal and immune system and the production of DHEA.
Step 4: Note any different perceptions you may have after you do this. You may want to write them down to remember them.